Tomorrow is Christmas. I sit here and write this as my ex-husband, Zach, and his new fiancé, Bailee, left from visiting Avery Grace because it is my holiday, Christmas Eve. But we share days- and that’s okay, if we’re home- they are invited over to see her and they know that. If we are out and about, they are invited to meet us up. Zach is Avery’s dad and we are all family, and that is okay.
Our coparenting plan is good and we are rocking it (not to brag), but it is not perfect. We fight, argue, and do not agree on everything- and that is okay. We have incorperated a “if it does not benefit Avery” objective. If we are arguing just to argue, we take a step back and come back to the scenario at a later time when we have cooled down. That is one great thing I would recommend to anyone, not just coparents. If you are arguing just to argue, take a step back, calm down, then reevaluate. You don’t always have to decide right then and that is okay.
Our Christmas routine is great for us. We decided to do Christmas Eve with mama, opening presents TOGETHER from Santa, then Christmas Day with daddy. Avery is so loved by everyone and has a lot of people who want to see her, so luckily Zach and I are in such great relationships that our significant other understanding the importance of us all involved. I know that not everyone is that lucky and my heart genuinely aches for those who cannot have an easy relationship and efficient coparenting situation. To those who don’t have that luxury, that is okay. I am still praying for you.
Tonight, Zach and David put together Avery presents and played while Bailee and I wrapped last minute presents. We are friends. We are family. We spend time together, we do family dinners often. We go to events, we go on vacations together. We go to church together AND we sit next to one another. We FaceTime with each other so Avery can see us before bed. We message throughout the day to check on Avery. Not everyone can do that.. And that is okay.
This Christmas may not be a good one. You may be dealing with loss, grief, sickness, sadness, being alone. I have been there, trust me. I have been that scene in the Grinch when he decides at 4:00 to wallow in self-pity. You don’t always have to be okay and you know what? That is okay. I will be thinking and praying for everyone going through a tough season in their life. I don’t need to know the reason- but if you need to talk, vent, or hear some encouraging words from someone, message me anytime. I will be your person, I will root for you, I will love you, I will encourage you.
Tomorrow, December 25th from 2-4 pm Cedar Point Church (1660 N Lynn Riggs Blvd Claremore, OK 74017) will be putting on a Gift of Christmas. It provides a meal and gifts to families on Christmas, isn’t that so cool? I will be there hanging out and chatting with all the sweet people who come to hangout tomorrow. I hope to see you there, especially if you have nowhere to go. Don’t stay home and watch Netflix because you’re being the Grinch at 4:00 wallowing. If you’re scared to be alone coming in, that is okay. I will be there and I will do everything in my power to make you comfortable. Feel free to share this so we can reach more people!
Christmas is a sweet time. I’m learning to be more festive because this didn’t use to be my cup of tea, but now that I have a sweet, tiny human- I am all about it. I hope your day is full of love and family and friend and pets and food and time well spent. I hope you remember if it’s not as amazing as you had hoped, that is okay. You are loved. You are enough. You are strong. You are brave. Joy comes in the morning.
Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night, except the mom still drinking wine and wrapping presents.. I know you’re not saying goodnight anytime soon. 🤣
“For his anger lasts only a moment, but his favor lasts a lifetime! Weeping may last through the night, but joy comes with the morning.” Psalm 30:5 NLT